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Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 6:50 am
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Metal Gear Duck
---

In the readme, the author apologizes in advance. Seeing as he already reviewed his own work, and given what it is, I don't think anything I write here will be of use to anyone. But a contest has rules, so...

It's a pretty good parody on the metal gear series. You could say anything with that music playing in the background, and it would make it sound insightful. Music is the most basic form of mind control.

The design of the metal gear games are genius, the writing is entertaining, but it tends to cross the line a lot. Be it excessive, self indulgent, or wacky statements meant to be taken seriously (usually happens toward the end.)

The voice acting's pretty good. Wish it made more sense after the intro.

Judgment: WE SHALL BE AS DUCKS
Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 6:58 am
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Monster Lot
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If there's one I'd want to skip, it would be this one. I don't want to knock it, especially given one of the authors seems a bit touchy, but come what may.

It seems like some effort was put into it. You can tell the authors knew what they were going for and they got it. So what's left to discuss is what they were going for and why it didn't work.

It seems influenced by Futurama. The pacing, the jokes, even some of the voice work sound like characters from the show. So I can just talk about the cartoon for a bit. It got so old to me. There's the idiot Fry, who acts like an idiot. There's the loudmouth Bender, who acts like a loudmouth. There's one liners and it's all ho hum. It was interesting at times, but never really funny. Kind of like the Simpsons. It's humor based on stereotypes. Or hard reversals, like what if someone really nice like santa is actually a killer robot?

Anyway. This has the best title screen so far because it uses a menu. More games should try that. It really adds a pro finish. Custom title screens are cool.

Judgment: Play if you're into Futurama fanfiction with original-characters.
Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 7:01 am
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Monster out of Six
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The download page clearly states to not rate this game. It was made with a 48 hour deadline. I wonder if some jerk rated it anyway... yup. 4 people did. That's kind of mean.

The intro explanation of what's going on is quite long. (understated)

I like the concept of the game. The story is a bit out there. Although the game isn't complete, there's a lot there for two days worth of work. I think the author was too ambitious.

There's a countdown clock for 1 hour on the screen. Seems like a long time for the scope of the game. At least factor in some commercial breaks.

Judgment: Can't recommend it.
Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 7:02 am
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Motrya for Casuals
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The file name is actually 'motrya easy'. (Hint: it's motrya looooong battle)

The graphics are amazing. I'm floored every time. The music is great, but the longer you go... you'll get rick rolled, among other things.

The enemy kills himself with attack recoil damage. For winning, you're treated to a high-pitch repeating ha-ha. This is JSH upholding his master troll status I guess. I wouldn't want to tango.

Judgment: Probably want to avoid this one.
Metal King Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 7:21 am
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Gomey's 2011 Year In Review #18: Film Festival Contest

I'm gonna admit, 15 reviews into 2011 and already I'm a little tired of games. RedMaverickZero and Surlaw apparently felt the same way back in May, challenging the community to change gears in their inaugural Film Festival Contest. OHR movies were nothing new, of course, JSH357's "OHR House" popularized, if not invented, the genre years before. There'd never been a movie contest though, and people seemed psyched. Stakes were higher than ever, with 30 bucks and original fan-art movie posters on the line for the winners. The rules were what you'd expect, the only minor curveball being a restriction on ripped graphics of any sort. What could possibly go wrong?

Things went swimmingly at first, there was an immediate positive response. Surlaw mused about the possiblity of "Walthros Cop". The public demanded Nathan Karr enter. After polling his electorate he posted a concept involving "The Four Musicians of Bremen". Even notorious contest-hater BaconLabs was on board. James Paige was so excited he finished a scene without noticing the contest hadn't officially started. It was during this lead-up phase that questions started to pop up, mostly about the ripped graphics policy. Particular emphasis was put on whether or not public domain images were allowable, whether or not modifying them would make it more acceptable and whether or not this included the Creative Common License.

Sensing a possible wave of dropouts, SDHawk mutinously suggested they enter whatever they wanted, calling the rule in question "stupid". A heated debate ensued, in which Surlaw argued that it was easier to ban all ripped graphics and derivative works than trying to define how modified something would have to be before it was considered original, and SDHawk argued that the voters would disqualify anything too ripped and that all the rule was doing was scaring an already small pool of entrants. Both sides raised valid points and things were starting to cool down when a third party's sarcastic comments were taken at face value. Surlaw blamed this on IRC trolls and closed the debate, ironically rousing the real "IRC Trolls" who had until then been sitting on the sidelines.

In another irony, it was the noted troll Spoonweaver who got things back on track with a lengthy series of photoshopped movie posters for his project "Deforestation". People were looking forward to the start of the contest again and wondering, "Can the hype be true?". They wouldn't have to wait long, just 25 hours into the contest and "Deforestation" was done. Four hours later, JSH357 would earn his second contest disqualification of the year with "Metal Gear DUCK". Both games were fully voice-acted, a trend that was only getting started.

After a straight-to-video "Deforestation" sequel, SDHawk and JSH presented "Triangle", an arthouse indictment of the Mr. Triangle character's homophobic past. The resulting discussion proved that both "sides" were capable of civil and mature discussion, and ended just as Spoonweaver concluded his "Deforestation" trilogy. Not a man to be out-produced, JSH responded with his own trilogy of indescribable "Harry Potter" adaptations, and a threat of four more. There were still three more weeks to go.

Soon, there were more previews. FnrrfYgmSchnish confused us all with images of Mouse Jesus. RedMaverickZero tipped his hand with concept art of a lobster in a business suit. Baconlabs proved he was finally going to enter a contest, posting three beautiful sets of walkabouts and portraits. James Paige was unable to enter, but shared 12 glorious seconds of animation in his "Great American Novel". Skullduggery Studios released what he had finished of 'The HangovOHR", a direct adaptation of the movie that ran shorter than 2 minutes and featured ripped graphics. He was double-dog disqualifed.

Under pressure of the deadline, Nathan Karr quit, citing burnout from his fan game. BaconLabs claimed illness and Nayus Dante didn't bother with excuses. Early on the last day I dropped out too, surprising nobody when I showed up 12 hours later with "Habla No Ingles: The Movie". Frnrff delivered the teachings of Mouse Jesus in "Fat Frog: The Movie" and RedMaverickZero and Surlaw surprised everyone by joining forces for the almost feature-length and voice acted "Monster Lot".

Voting began on the 19th. Voters were asked to judge each entry on presentation, story, and overall enjoyability using a scale of 1 to 3. Those 3 scores would then be averaged to produce the "actual vote", the actual votes would then be summed up and averaged to determine the winner. Authors who had entered more than one game would have all of their entries averaged together. It was an innovative system, but one that didn't leave a lot of room for error. Games that were merely "below average" were lumped in with the "worst imaginable". People complained openly and motivations were questioned, with grumblings of favoritism on all sides. Perhaps I behaved the worst, changing my vote in response to a perceived slight by Surlaw, though changing it back after talking things out. After voting, James Paige would suggest that perhaps a scale of 1-5 wouldn't have felt so personal and in hindsight I agree with him.

Results were printed in the July Issue of HamsterSpeak. "Fat Frog: The Movie" was the winner, "Triangle" coming in second, "Habla No Ingles: The Movie" squeaking into third, "Monster Lot" fourth, and the "Deforestation" movies beating the "Harry Potter" ones. Tensions continued even after the contest. No word was given on prizes until late September, when upon inquiry, RedMaverickZero implied that there would be no prizes. Following some stupid gestures (Which will be brought up in October), yet another public debate brought around the eventual compromise that RMZ would instead deliver Subway giftcards to the winners, a group photo of the winners' characters for HSpeak, and would never offer prizes in a contest again.

The lesson to be learned from all this is that you need to talk to people. So long as both sides continue to sit in their respective caves sniping at each other this kind of conflict is inevitable and will only serve to wear down everyone's enthusiasm for the real reason we're here: making games. Nobody's getting any younger. Any day now, we might have to give up our hobbies for a real job, for our families, for our health. As we reminisce about 2011, look at all the people who made their first game and look at how many never made it that far. We're all lucky to still be here, doing something that excites us.

I hope this doesn't open any old wounds. I only bring it up to establish context and to show how a little thing here or there in the heat of the moment can snowball into a big, ugly mess that leaves everyone a loser. Now that the drama's overshadowed them in print as much as it did in 2011, it's time to talk about the important part: the OHR movies.

Part of Gomey's 2011 Year In Review
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Metal King Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 7:27 am
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Gomey's 2011 Year In Review #24/25/26: Harry Potter Trilogy

JSH357's "Harry Potter" trilogy is the weirdest JK Rowlings fanfiction he's written since Motrya. Essentially, every game is just a summary of one of the books, but by adding MS Paint illustrations featuring the "Duck and MJ" gang and a variety of the world's worst voice simulators (think Stephen Hawking negotiating a hostage exchange) the resulting movies are a very entertaining kind of terrible.

The voice and the subtitles never fully match up, which adds a little charm. JSH's illustrations offer some funny takes on the ongoing events and readers of the books will get some enjoyment out of the way JSH abitrarily leaves in/out important plot points and random trivia. the best example of this is the first screen of the first movie which matter of factly explains "One day, Harry Potter was eleven." Indeed he was, JSH357. Indeed he was.

Humor like this is tricky to execute properly. The "Harry Potter" trilogy has a lot of charm, but falls short in a lot of technical merits. It doesn't play with your expectations like "Deforestation", after you've played the first one you know the joke. Had JSH given the "Duck and MJ" treatment to the remaining four books, playing with expectations and confronting the more memorable scenes and spoilers of the later books, it'd be easier to give these first three a better score as a means to an end. Without that reward at the end, it's just three goofy short movies by a guy usually known for better things. Funny if you have to watch 'em, but not worth going out of your way for.

HARRY POTTER AND THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE
Vocal Talent: A See & Say
Score: 2/10

HARRY POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS:
Vocal Talent: Keith Richards
Score:3/10

HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN:
Vocal Talent: The French robot from "Fat Frog: The Movie"
Score:1/10

2011 Score (Per May 30th): 67/100


Part of Gomey's 2011 Year In Review
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Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 1:22 pm
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RMSephy gripes about MasterK's Labyrinth

I played this game because it had the same name as one of my games, and also because JSH fooled me into thinking it was a roguelike. The goal of MasterK's game is to find your way out of the eponymous labyrinth. Along the way, you need to fight monsters, solve some riddles, and find items you need to defeat a final boss.

There are several types of monsters, each of which is vulnerable to one type of weapon. If you have the right weapon, you defeat the monster. Otherwise, it's an instant game over. Basically the combat boils down to looking for weapons and dodging enemies that you can't kill. I think this battle system is intended to be the core of the gameplay, but I think it ends up being overly simplistic. Most enemies follow one or two movement patterns and the hallways are wide enough to let you dodge any monster easily.

Which brings me to the next problem. The maps tend to be on the large side, and there's not enough substance to justify the size. This game being a treasure hunt of sorts, there's a lot of walking to be done from one point to another. I used the F1 map to find the level exits and guess at the location of treasure chests, thankfully averting a lot of the backtracking I probably would've had to do otherwise. It wasn't enough to stop me from finishing the game (thanks to being able to save anywhere), but I think the abundance of nothingness hurts the game.

The game also gets a bit buggy towards the end. On the final floor (in the area with the bridges), there are several enemies that don't disappear when they're supposed to and trap you in an endless textbox loop.

I don't think the idea behind this game is inherently bad, but there's a lot more that needs to be done to make it work.
A Scrambled Egg
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 1:51 pm
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Giz, that's a good summary of the contest and I thank you for writing an actual, in depth review of our movie.
Super Walrus Land: Mouth Words Edition
Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 3:56 pm
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Quote:
. I doubt "6EQUJ5" could mean anything interesting, and is likely there for texture.


Probably a reference to #22 on this list. Doesn't seem too likely that someone would put that exact sequence of letters and numbers on their game by random coincidence.
Bok's Expedition -- Final playtesting... now just need to make an ending
Puckamon -- Not until the reserve party is expanded
Liquid Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 4:15 pm
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There are some hilarious comments to that article
My website, the home of Motrya:
http://www.jshgaming.com
Super Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 5:27 pm
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charbile wrote:
Why are certain game makers so insecure about their work while others take it so well?

I know why. Tee hee.


Certain game makers really can't stand you.
Mega Tact v1.1
Super Penguin Chef
Wizard Blocks
Slime Knight
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 5:39 pm
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Newbie Newtype wrote:
Quote:
I just don't see it as high art
I think that's what people see in it. It's quirky and anti-high art.


Neither. I simply liked the look of the game and that was probably merits of the decisions and style. That is to say it was well designed visually. I don't really give a damn if it was as easy as hitting the flood-fill, it's the results that count yes? A lazy game can look like nothing, but this looks like something, perhaps that merit should be considered since games often focus on detail and that one was full-blown minimalist.

Design, style and so on. Anyway. Nothing to get too freaked out about.
Reigning Smash Champion
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 6:18 pm
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Quote:
The graphics are amazing. I'm floored every time.
I don't believe you.

Quote:
perhaps that merit should be considered since games often focus on detail and that one was full-blown minimalist.
This was what I mean by "anti-high art" (remember, I am using JSH's terminology against him and would not actually say such a thing normally).
Liquid Metal Slime
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 6:30 pm
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I was hoping not to respond but I cannot believe this got dragged out so long.

When I said "This isn't high art" I was actually referring to Surlaw's statement:

"I really disagree that anyone can create graphics like these and have them work. "

This is said in the sense that the creator of the game had to put real effort in making it look like this. I'm saying "this isn't high art" in the sense of "this doesn't take a lot of time or talent to make."

The tiles are a single color block. The sprites are sloppy and look like a child who'd never drawn a picture could have drawn them. Again, I'm not judging anyone who actually likes the style, but the claim that this takes something beyond minimal talent to create is absurd. I can draw a house sitting on a field of grass in 1 minute in MSPaint that would effectively look like Star Quest's graphics.

Again, an excellent game to compare it with is Castle on the Night Land, which has much better-crafted tiles that actually justify the use of the style. Star Quest's tiles look lazily crafted in comparison.
My website, the home of Motrya:
http://www.jshgaming.com
Reigning Smash Champion
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 PostTue Jan 24, 2012 6:38 pm
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Motrya has spoiled JSH.
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