Cretinary

Write and read reviews of games that have been uploaded to Slime Salad.

Moderators: Bob the Hamster, marionline, SDHawk

Post Reply

Should I post my own weird vore games for consumption?

NO EAT!
1
17%
Do it!
5
83%
 
Total votes: 6

User avatar
Nathan Karr
Liquid Metal Slime
Posts: 1215
Joined: Fri Jan 25, 2008 3:51 am
Contact:

Cretinary

Post by Nathan Karr »

Mircea uploaded a whole bunch of games, which I decided to look at because I wanted to see vore and NSFW content. Of those games this one is by far my favorite.

Gameplay:
Sub-par but at least it's easy. I usually fought each random enemy one time legit, then used F7 each time it came up afterward. Owteezm has some healing spells, buffing spells, and debuffing spells. The healing spell can't be aimed at a specific hero in battle, making "Some Idiot" a net detriment to the gameplay, quite intentionally (his only attack is to hit himself on the head with a rock...which slightly heals him rather than hurting him).

Graphics:
Vikings of Midgard sprites with ugly palettes, badly tiled maps (though no worse than the other games put up around the same time, and much more readable than the indoor areas in many of them), minor pixel edits in some cases, and I think a dildo from one of Fenrir's porn games?

Minor annoyances:
Lots of times there are doors that lead to themselves, serving no purpose but to lock control for a second and fade in/out when passing through what should be a simple pass-through tile indoors. This is worst with the monastery's staircase, but honestly it's way more annoying in the other games uploaded alongside it.

After a certain point, the NPC who serves as the sole shop and inn decides to simply refuse service, but there are still random battles in the last couple maps. The joke that he's on break should have had him switch to just the inn function.

Items declared to be "crosses" are marked with a horned helmet icon and those marked "slippers" use a hat icon, seemingly for no reason other than being too lazy to change the font characters from the default. If this was an intentional joke, it falls flat.

The humor:
This game has a few jokes, some of which land more often than not
  • Religion in general and Christianity in particular is stupid and all priests are perverse
    Owteezm is especially stupid, incompetent, and perverse
    His friend Some Idiot is even more stupid
    All forms of capitalism and free enterprise are evil
    Somehow industry and industry alone is responsible for global warming, and industrial cattle farming doesn't count because it's not a car or a factory with a big spooky smokestack
    Furries are gross and perverse drama queens
    The guy who claims he isn't Cthulhu is actually Cthulhu
Of these, the jokes at the expense of the main characters and the furry fandom tend to be the funniest, in part because they're the only ones where the author comes across as informed on the issues. The rest comes across as a 14 year old's attempts to be edgy which, not knowing how old our foxy scat vore friend is or how long this game's been sitting on his computer, it very well might be.
Attachments
One of the funniest jokes in the game. If this doesn't amuse you, don't bother playing the rest of it.
One of the funniest jokes in the game. If this doesn't amuse you, don't bother playing the rest of it.
Cretinary0004.png (24.32 KiB) Viewed 7223 times
Took me a while to figure out if this was supposed to be pro-Trump or anti-Trump. Figured it out when I came back later and this guy did get vored.
Took me a while to figure out if this was supposed to be pro-Trump or anti-Trump. Figured it out when I came back later and this guy did get vored.
Cretinary0003.png (42.52 KiB) Viewed 7223 times
The two black minions of the bad guy have social commentary that's basically out of place with how poignant it is. Actual wit doesn't fit the game's theme at all.
The two black minions of the bad guy have social commentary that's basically out of place with how poignant it is. Actual wit doesn't fit the game's theme at all.
Cretinary0002.png (39.74 KiB) Viewed 7223 times
There's a couple other instances of this crazy moon talk. It's not even cool when native English speakers talk like this.
There's a couple other instances of this crazy moon talk. It's not even cool when native English speakers talk like this.
Cretinary0000.png (13.91 KiB) Viewed 7223 times
Last edited by Nathan Karr on Tue Jul 30, 2019 4:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
Remeber: God made you special and he loves you very much. Bye!
User avatar
MirceaKitsune
Red Slime
Posts: 43
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2012 7:50 pm
Location: Romania, Bucharest

Post by MirceaKitsune »

Thanks for the silly review! Glad you... um, like it? This one's been sitting on my drive for a while and is kind of discontinued by now: I remember implementing some items and tweaking the balance was the last thing on my TODO list, doubt I'll still get around to it now.

This was meant to be simplistic and bad on purpose... I remember I was inspired by another entry in a ridiculous games contest from the community, the purpose was to make something purely silly which poked fun at a lot of stuff. I've been putting the real effort into more important games, but being carried away with other projects I haven't gotten back to them in a while, leaving this the only (almost) finished game I got to publish so far.
Post Reply