I liked All of the Games!
RANKS
How well did it meet a theme?
1. Clam Digger - Dr. Mu would be proud!
2. Pilgrimage - Gahn would be proud!
3. Trolls! - Billy would be proud!
4. My Little Gahn - Gahn would be ok with it.
5. Karrible.RPG - Billy would be ok with it.
6. Super Harem 2012 - Dr. Mu would be ok with it.
7. Memento Mori - Dr. Mu would play it.
Who is Top Dog?
1. Clam Digger
2. Pilgrimage
3. Memento Mori
4. Trolls!
5. Super Harem 2012
6. My Little Gahn
7. Karrible.RPG
Words?
My Little Gahn
RIDICULOUSly good scripting! But looks aren't everything! The game is
a Hollywood remake of Nathan Karr's magnum opus Weegee, but without
the heart that made that game a classic. The OHR Heart. A point is
automatically deducted from this game for its title, which should have
been Star Quest II: The Wrath of Gahn. A missed opportunity that leaves the audience scared and angry. I assume all of this game's budget was spent on marketing due to its use of stock footage. The game certainly would have been better if it had had at least another $500,000 to work with. I couldn't pay attention to the game's dialogue because I simply can't relate to something set in an environment as alien as an office, and also horses don't have wings! I assume the flying horse scene was a production error because how else can you explain that? Horses don't fly. Also what is a Charbile??
Trolls!
RIDICULOUSly boring! A true call back to the glory days of Terrible Games Contests. It looks bad and plays worse. It's perfect! I don't know if the game has an ending because I threw up everywhere when I played it. I thought trolls had more hair than this? Is the hero a barber and his customers are angry because he took too much off the top? IS THAT the game?
Memento Mori
RIDICULOUSly competent! I didn't feel any fear or loathing in this game but I did die a lot. Sadly I learned nothing!! I like that your guy farts when he jumps, that is a good feature and it explains why it's so dangerous for him to be around open flames and also sand. This game is
a commentary on the inevitability of death, the sands are the sands of time, in an hour glass, and you can look back on your memories but you CAN'T change the past.
KARRIBLE.RPG
RIDICULOUSly good title screen! You gain two points for having Geordi LaForge in the game but LOSE one for not letting me play as him. The writing is super stupid! Really stupid. I got bored of the writing but I liked all the pretty flashing lights and the maptiles are superb. You should copy Trolls! battle system and the game will be a better game but then it wouldn't be a game at all, it would be an examination. You gain one point for making a Mega Man RPG about an alien invasion but lose TWO by making the aliens human instead of Klingons, Romulans, Hortas, and Remans. What were you thinking?
Super Harem Builder 2012
RIDICULOUSly menu driven! This game is the true sequel to Pepsi Ranger's 80's simulator Entrepreneur. If anything I would say it is the Pokemon Yellow to Pepsi Ranger's Pokemon Red. I couldn't figure out how to get a Psyduck and I didn't have anyone to trade with but I like the
music! If ever you wanted to be the best 80's Guy possible you should play this but you should also play Entrepreneur but I think Harem Builder has the edge because you can't charm your way past fire hydrants in Entrepreneur, you need to serve them coffee.
Pilgrimage
RIDICULOUSly post modern! I like how much I hated the RPG part but liked the end part with all the words, this game proves decisively that visual mediums are boring. They are boring, and video games are boring, but reading, that is still fun. I had fun. I want to be a rock person too but maybe not because they all died I guess. This is the OHR's Nier, only political.
Clam Digger
RIDICULOUSly good intro! It is probably the best intro I have seen, I suppose the honest truth is this is a game I can relate to, because I know what it's like to be a car. There's a lot of social commentary in this one too! The commentary is that society is bad. If you can win the game, you rock! It's what experts call "Nintendo Hard" and there are lots of dogs and birds in it so it's a lot like Ninja Gaiden to be honest.
Super Walrus Land: Mouth Words Edition
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