Review: Unofficial 2013 Great Review Contest Random Game C..

[Spoonweaver]

Unofficial 2013 Great Review Contest Random Game Chooser. One of the many unplayable creations crowding our community game list. Why are they all here? Why are WE here? What does it all mean...
The idea of a contest designed to get people to review the shotgun blast of games we get in this community seems odd to me. The goal of the contest isn't to write the best reviews, most creative reviews, or even the longest reviews. The goal is simply to write any review. The idea is basically standards don't matter. Just sort of have fun with it, or don't, who cares. Why are we even reviewing most of these games anyways. Who's going to read these things?
Clearly if our target for these reviews is the developer, then we should go into depth about different game bugs and design choices that don't seem to work. But let's face it, most of the developers for these games are one shot kings and are long gone by now. And on top of that, how many developers here would actually take review advise to heart past big game breaking bugs. Not many I would guess.
So then we move on to reviews for potential players of these games. If we're reviewing for them, we'd basically want to limit the review to a handful of words right? They don't have time to just try out the game and see for themselves so they clearly won't have time to read more than 1-2 short paragraphs anyways.
Anyways, what I'm really getting at, past the idea of what's the point of helping developers here if they clearly don't seem to want it, is what exactly should a review of this game chooser contain. Giz knows that this thing is basically a joke. Plus, outside of last year's review contest not only is it likely no one will play this, but I hope no one does. Downloading this thing will likely drive them away from playing other games out of pure confusion.
The thing is well scripted. It handled it's little job well. However, not only should no one play this, it doesn't even belong on a game list.
1/10

[Gizmog]

Great review, Spoonweaver.

[quote="Spoonweaver"]
The thing is well scripted. It handled it's little job well. However, not only should no one play this, it doesn't even belong on a game list.
1/10[/quote]

Says the man who made Cat In Box and Clam Digger.

[Spoonweaver]

Oh giz...

I could get in a debate with you over this that could sunder the heavens.
But what I simply meant, and I thought was clear, was that this is not a game. This is basically some sort of tool. A tool with a very limited use. I'd rank this under tech demo.

For someone dishing out so much review, you're almost reaching Fnrrf level of rage response with that post.



~If you had mentioned the raisin bran sun guy and the caption, I would have conceded the point.

[Gizmog]

Oh giz...

I could get in a debate with you over this that could sunder the heavens.
But what I simply meant, and I thought was clear, was that this is not a game. This is basically some sort of tool. A tool with a very limited use. I'd rank this under tech demo.

For someone dishing out so much review, you're almost reaching Fnrrf level of rage response with that post.



~If you had mentioned the raisin bran sun guy and the caption, I would have conceded the point.

Oh, I thought I was just kiddin' around. I agree 100%, it's an obsolete entry on the gamelist. I love having it up there, I wouldn't ever delete it "just 'cause the contest is over" or something because that feels dishonest somehow, like revising history. I actually feel a lot of contest games are like this; Things that are never going to get better than what they are now, things whose existences were tied to long-gone contests with no continued reason to exist.

Like, if you were to pick a game at random off of the whole gamelist, what're the chances it would be something you could sit down and play for an hour? What would the chances be it's something that's finished? How likely is it that it'd be drawn in crayon, or have baboon grunting for music because of some crazy contest that no one remembers? How likely is it that the author even remembers making it?

If I could mark this game as a Utility (Tech Demo implies it isn't complete) to keep some random fun-seeker from hitting it, I would. If we could categorize contest games in a certain way, so that people who download them could see the rules of the contest and know what they were downloading that would be great.

That's the same kind of reason I brought up Clam Digger and Cat In Box. I don't think either of them are "bad", I just think they'd be confusing.. I hate to propose any kind of "HEART OF THE OHR, RPGS ONLY!" kind of bullcrap, that's not what I'm trying to say but it's coming out that way. They're not games you can get deeply invested in, I guess is what I'm trying to say. A snack instead of a meal.

I don't want to imply that these things shouldn't be on the gamelist, it's a great time capsule of where the community's been and who we were. I Made Dis makes me laugh a decade later and objectively it's terrible, I'd hate for anyone to try to delete it because it wasn't "real". If someone spent the time to make it and upload it, it belongs on the list. I just wish there was a way we could add some context. I don't want someone to wander into the community and think we're just jokes, but I wouldn't want them to think we're all serious RPGs either. Maybe categories or something would help this and maybe they wouldn't. I definitely wouldn't want to be the chooser, or the guy who has to try and police it, but some kind of basic system might be a benefit.

All that said, this random fun-seeker is possibly a false concept. The newest games on the gamelist seem to have around 20-100 downloads, and the oldest seem to have 200-500. That's not much difference over 7 years, I'd expect robots to have hit most of 'em at least a thousand times in 2,100 days. If someone downloads a game, I'm betting they meant to download it.

So sorry if you thought I meant anything by it, I really do agree with most of your points. Just couldn't resist trying to start a fight and make a point at the same time.

[Spoonweaver]

Nah, I could tell what you were doing.

I wasn't really saying, this should be taken off the game list. I was kind of just hinting at what you were saying about some sort of category system, which I've suggested in the past.

At the same time, I was struggling with how I should go about reviewing it. If I was reviewing it for you, I'd say stuff like, "Man you made this well." or "Best OHR game chooser of 2013." But what I've come to understand about the reviews is that we're not writing them for the developer. They're long gone in most of the cases or at least unlikely to take head of the advise. No, we're writing these for each other, for players, for the future. And that's why this review said your game shouldn't be played. So future ohr people will know what the deal is here.

[Gizmog]

Oh, I getcha. We cool. Carry on!

[Spoonweaver]

Also, clam digger and cat in box are both better than all your games combined.


FLAME WAR!

[The Wobbler]

Please make Football in the Groin as a follow up to Cat in your Box, thanks in advance.

[Spoonweaver]

.....I kind of want to make that now.


People should have conversations in reviews more often.

[The Wobbler]

Have like a meter that raises and falls and you have to hit a button at just the right time to nail a dude in the crotch with the ball, do it you know you could do it

[Sparoku]

Have like a meter that raises and falls and you have to hit a button at just the right time to nail a dude in the crotch with the ball, do it you know you could do it

You mean like that mini game in Kirby Super-Star? The one where you're chopping those cement blocks in two?

[Meowskivich]

Have like a meter that raises and falls and you have to hit a button at just the right time to nail a dude in the crotch with the ball, do it you know you could do it

You mean like that mini game in Kirby Super-Star? The one where you're chopping those cement blocks in two?

yes, but with underzones instead.

[Sparoku]

Have like a meter that raises and falls and you have to hit a button at just the right time to nail a dude in the crotch with the ball, do it you know you could do it

You mean like that mini game in Kirby Super-Star? The one where you're chopping those cement blocks in two?

yes, but with underzones instead.

I'd like to see that. XD